The Sock Hop My poor children and husband. If there is an occasion of any kind…and I mean any kind…there will be photographs. I will bark orders and physically force folks to comply with my evil compositions. If there is … Continue reading
Category Archives: Humor
My Penguin
Before I launch into my excessively wordy and sappy Valentine tribute to my boyfriend, I want to describe the sequence of events surrounding the taking of these pictures. 15 year old was snapping pictures while the 12 year old was … Continue reading
Old Women and Driving Permits
There comes a time in every mom’s life when she wakes up and regularly surmises, “Holy Potatoes. I woke up older than dirt.” This happens on days when she wakes up with a mysterious limp and the only physical activity … Continue reading
Snow, I mean ICE days in Texas
We have this early spring phenomena in Texas called Ice Storms. It’s where Texas gets super drunk and pees really cold rain and sleet all over us and then forgets that it’s late February and proceeds to freeze overnight. Trees … Continue reading
Hurcuttin’, 5 o’clock Shadows and Adulting
Today was hurcuttin’ day at the Abernathy’s. When you have as many heads as we do, you improvise. Since we spend so much money on peanut butter, mayonnaise and toilet paper, there’s really no room in the budget for new … Continue reading
Headaches and Naked Photos
I had a headache for ten twelve days recently. I’m getting old and premenopausal (I’m self-diagnosing here but have an appointment with my MALE PCP to confirm my suspicions and hopefully get some concrete solutions for my FEMALE problems) and … Continue reading
The Laundry Nazi
Laundry-doers of the world, UNITE! It’s a scary, filthy machine that never stops rolling and you are the one stainless-steel cog that keeps the whole show a-showin’. Usually, before 8am, I’ve logged 4,000 harried steps on the Fitbit, tallied about … Continue reading
Don’t Go to Your Local Gym!
Fitbit says: Congratulations, Jesi! Your 30 minute high-intensity workout was auto-detected and added to your weekly stats. Jesi says: Nope. That was my daily farm chores and time spent chasing toddlers for a diaper change. Moral of the story: to … Continue reading
Fun, Old Fashioned Family Christmas Album
What do you get when you add up nine cousins, five moms and dads, a Grammy and a Grampy and 17 days of Fun, Old Fashioned Family Christmas? One epic ugly Christmas sweater family photo, that’s what. Oh…and an over-flowing … Continue reading
The Case for the Elf
Let’s face it, the elf is creepy. I resisted. I did. I completely refused for a while. I figured my kids are weird, unsocialized homeschoolers, so maybe they won’t find out, right? I forgot they look at Facebook over my … Continue reading
How to Put 2 Year Old Twin Boys to Bed in Ten Easy Steps
How to put 2 year old twin boys to bed in ten steps when everyone else is at violin lessons: Step 1: Feed them dinner because they’re irrationally and inexplicably hungry at all hours of the day and night. Don’t … Continue reading
Only at the Baby Ranch…
Funny stuff from the Abernathy Baby Ranch today: 1. Leaves fall into the category of “best toy ever”. 2. Had to take an impromptu jaunt to Lowe’s to buy a new refrigerator because the other one is choking and taking … Continue reading
Halloween: Abernathy Style
What does Elsa + Little Red Riding Hood + Kim Possible + Iron Man + Fifties girl (or “office worker”, as Harleigh described her costume) + Grumpy Old Men = ? Halloween, Abernathy Style. Happy Halloween from two grumpy, little … Continue reading
Bad Baby Room
You know, if you ever question if dads are necessary, I whole heartedly can assure you, they are. ❤️ Daddy is in Houston with Uncle Davey helping with clean up after Hurricane Harleigh (she totally thought “Harvey” was Harleigh and … Continue reading
Bad Baby Room
We may have to start calling our shenanigans “Tales from the Chapel” because the boys made it through by the skin of their teeth today! 🎉 We had to leave a couple times because of reaching Howler Monkey status, but … Continue reading
Twins Like to BBQ, too
Note to self: Don’t let twin two year olds play in the vicinity of an unattended, greasy, grimy grill. *this happened during a quick (less than a minute) bathroom trip for mom. **the grill wasn’t hot, luckily. ***it took 20 … Continue reading